At Starbucks in sunny Singapore…

Dear Diary,

One sunny day in southern Singapore, Mania and Depression met at a Starbucks coffee joint. They had decided to sign a deal to cooperate on a project that they’d be working together on.

Mania: “As agreed, you’d do 75% of the work and I’ll do the other 25%.”

Depression: “Yes. But how do we go about doing this? I mean, the frequency at which we occupy her mind and all?”

Mania: “I’ve got it all worked out. In the beginning, you’ll ravage her in her final year at university as she works hopelessly on her Final Year Project. I’ll throw in an unhelpful professor to spice things up. She will be utterly hopeless. Then, when things can’t get any worse for her, I’ll pop right in.”

Depression: “Why do you come in then? Isn’t the goal to debilitate her?”

Mania: “Ah, that’s why my plan is so brilliant. See, I’ll slip in unnoticed and be a breath of fresh air for her. She will be astounded at her increased energy and creativity she wouldn’t suspect a thing. I’ll then turn the knob up slowly and gradually until she works herself sick. That’s what they always do.”

Depression: “Sounds like a plan. When shall we start?”

Mania: “Right now seems to be a good time. Let’s sign a 5 year contract and then renew it again with new terms in another 5 shall we?”
Depression: “Alright. Where do I sign?”

Mania: “Right over here on the dotted line.”

Mania and Depression thus signed two copies of the agreement and kept one copy for themselves. This was going to be a long term project that they’d be working together on. Mania had gotten off with only 25% of the work, the charming old fella with his fast talk and smooth tongue convincing the melancholic Depression to do the other 75% of it. Depression was none the wiser, carrying her heavy burden everywhere he went, loading it on unsuspecting shoulders, weighing them down slowly but surely.

And so, Mania and Depression shook hands, finished their lattes, and went away to work on their other projects all over the little island called Singapore.

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